Radical Blaming

This kids won’t go to sleep, my wife won’t stop arguing, my staff keep doing it wrong, my clients don’t do what they said they’d do aaaaarghh... 

Life can be seriously frustrating sometimes... 

Why won’t people just operate how I expect them to? 

That’s one way to look at life and it makes total sense. 

I’ve done it. 

I still do it... 

But when you look at it closely the frustration and even sometimes anger isn’t anything to do with them. 

It’s there because of a subtle decision. 

The decision to put the power in their hands by put the blame on them. 

The frustration and anger isn’t about them. It’s because that subtle decision has rendered us helpless. 

If we take the blame and the responsibility though... 

We now have the ability to response. 

No frustration 

Just, oh, 

That happens when I do that. 

Let’s look at what happened and what I did and then look at what I will do differently next time.

The answer almost always comes back to the environment you created, or thing you said, or didn’t. 

Yes THEY are involved too, 

YET you can’t control other people’s behaviour, 

But it’s your life, 

your game,

Your rules, 

Blame = freedom 

No blame = frustration 

It’s up to you. 

Ed Ley